


The Bugle: An American Workplace

by ABC24



Category: Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Gen, Office AU, Pranks, copious amounts of sarcasm, oblivious dorks, the office au no one asked for
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-21
Updated: 2019-10-22
Packaged: 2020-12-27 20:56:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,222
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21125123
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ABC24/pseuds/ABC24
Summary: The Office U.S!AUAs part of their final project, a group of student filmmakers started to document the lives of employees at The Daily Bugle. Led by J. Jonah Jameson The Daily Bugle has been running for the past 50 years. They should have known that there would be more than meets the eye:“You’ll learn that this place won’t make good television pretty quick.”“I think it might be worthwhile sticking around.”





	1. Pilot

**Author's Note:**

> This isn't completely canonical with The Office, I've kinda picked and chosen scenes and reworked certain characters/situation to fit a bit better. 
> 
> This is my first time writing something of this style so... OH WELL 
> 
> I've had this sitting in my drafts FOR MONTHS with no work being done on it, so I'm posting it in an attempt to find motivation to finish it. I've got a few more scenes written/drafted out, so who knows maybe there will be a couple more chapters. Either way... Enjoy!

** Day One **

The crew stands in a tight hallway on the fourth floor, focusing the camera on sign that reads ‘The Daily Bugle’. J. Jonah Jameson steps into view of their camera, standing next to the sign. The crew chose this small tabloid as the focus of their documentary solely based on the rumours surrounded its Editor. A few of their interviews with ex-employees suggested that he was a tyrannical, egotistical know-it-all with no social skills whatsoever. In their first few minutes of having the man himself on camera they’d started to understand what those employees had meant.

“I’ve been Editor And Chief of this paper since it’s very beginnings! That’s what we call the head huncho in this business.” Jameson states proudly.

“Isn’t it Editor-In-Chief?” One of the crew asks.

“Common misconception.” Jameson responds gruffly, “You’d know that if you’d worked for 40 years in this industry,” He continued to grumble, “You should fit in perfectly with the rest of the rabble. They know nothing about editorial writing either.” He turned and led the small team into the main office area.

The office was small

“This is our receptionist Betty. Betty has been with us… Well forever, really.

Michelle Jones, lead feature writer.

Eugene-“

“Flash!” A voice from behind one of the screens cut in. The employee was the only one dressed in a full suit, everyone else leaning more towards the casual side of Business-Casual.

“-Thompson. Assistant to the Editor.” Jameson continued as if he hadn’t heard the interruption.

“Assistant Editor”

“To the Editor!”

“Ned Leeds… What is it that I pay you for again?” Jameson asked with furrowed brows. Ned opened his mouth before Jameson glanced back at the cameras and waved his hand, “We can edit it in later!” The younger man’s expression dropped as he stared directly into the camera. “IT Support” He simply mouthed.

“And finally, Peter Parker. Our star photographer! All those snaps of Spidey? They’re all him. My star student!”

* * *

“People think I’m a great boss,” Jameson stated bluntly, leaning back in his chair with his legs propped up on the table. He had a lit cigar sitting between his lips, muffling his words. The camera man subtly focused on the ‘no smoking’ sign that could be seen in the hallway on a ‘list of office rules’, just below ‘no bullshit’.

Jameson shifted forward and tapped the cigar ash into a white mug. He lifted the cup and turned it to the crew, “I think that pretty much sums it up.”

The mug read ‘World’s best boss’.

* * *

“Jonah!” Flash yelled, dropping his satchel to the ground as he caught the first glimpse of his desk. “Jonah!” He shouted once more. His angry eyes flitted over the office before landing on the Photographer who sat a few desks over from him. “You.” He spat, “Jonah! Parker did it again!”

Jonah exited his office with a sigh. “What is it this time Eugene?”

“Peter put my things in jello again!” – Flash

“What?” Peter frowned, lifting his head up from where he’d been slouched, half asleep at his desk.

“You. Put. My. Stapler. In. Jello.”

“Hilarious, but it wasn’t me.”

“Okay. Okay. Alright. Eugene, shut it. Parker, did you do this?”

“No!”

“Parker. I don’t have time for this. Did you do it? Apologise!”

“I didn’t do it!”

“Yeah! It couldn’t have been Peter.” Ned butted in, spinning around in his chair to face the trio, “He was late because of the-…” His words slowed, catching sight of Peter’s wide eyes. “Traffic.”

“Parker? You were late again?!” Jameson shouted. His eyebrows furrowed and lips tightened. Peter slid further down his seat, bringing his hands to cover his face. “Do you even have those shots?!” He continued to huff. “My office. Now.”

“But my stuff!” Flash whined, shaking the plate the held the stapler. The jello jiggled with the movement, mocking the boy and causing a snort to erupt from Ned.

“Just eat it out, Thompson.”

“That’s what she said!” Abe called from across the office.

Michelle sat at her desk, watching the whole debacle. She looked at the camera and winked, lifting a spoonful of bright orange jello into her mouth which matched the mess that entrapped all of Flash’s office supplies.

* * *

“Why’d I do it?” Michelle asked with a bored expression. “Flash is a dick and Peter’s always late.”

There was a long silence.

“You’ll learn that this place won’t make good television pretty quick.”

“I think it might be worthwhile sticking around.”

Michelle squinted, cocking her head ever so slightly. Behind the cameras, the few crew members in the conference room with her seem unnerved.

“Do you?”

* * *

The crew had set up a few stationary cameras around the office. In their first few hours they had learnt that more went on than they could possibly capture with just the one camera moving from desk to desk. There was one overlooking the HR and IT department where Ned Leeds, Cindy Moon and Roger Harrison sat. Another set up in the break room and the reception.

“That’s weird, right? George Orwell would have a field day.” Michelle said, leaning against the reception desk whilst Peter rummaged through Betty’s desk. He poked his head up at the girls’ words and glanced over at the camera, eyes wide.

“How many have they got set up now? S’gotta be an invasion of privacy.” His eyes flickered over to his desk where his backpack lay haphazardly under his desk.

“Scared they’ll reveal your secret addiction to gummy worms?” Michelle teased, leaning over the counter to look down at him.

“It’s been a tough day and Betty cleared the vending machine of them.” Peter said hurriedly before continuing his rummaging.

“Addict.” She laughed in return, turning back to ‘look out’ even though she knew Betty was over in IT sitting with Ned and would continue doing that until Jameson noticed she was gone.

“Got ‘em!” He cheered a second later, causing few heads looked up in the office causing Peter to blush and ducking down. Michelle cackled at the sight before clamping a hand over her mouth.

“We good here?”

“No… I gotta know… Are you going to Flash’s DJ Debut party?” Peter asked, lifting up the invite Betty had left on her desk.

“Oh. Yeah. Definitely.” Michelle snorted, plucking the invite out of Peter’s hand, their fingers brushing. Peter’s blush crept back once more, and he ducked his head.

* * *

“So, you’re asking if when I graduated college, I pictured myself working as an underpaid, underappreciated photographer at a subpar tabloid that is the printed version of clickbait, which is ran by an-… Is this gonna be aired?” Peter asked, cocking his head. The crew nodded. “A lovely man. But yeah. Definitely. That’s exactly how I wanted my Chemical Engineering degree to be used.”

“Does that mean you don’t like working here?”

There’s a knock at the door. Michelle pokes her head in.

“Sorry.” She said to the crew as a greeting. “Parker, we’ve got a lead to get to.” She told him, not bothering to wait for a response before she ducked back out of the room. There was a long pause after she left. Peter was unable to keep the smile off his face, chewing the inside of his cheek to stop it transforming into a full-blown grin.

“Nah. It’s got it’s benefits.” He said as he stood, starting to detach his mic pack from his jeans. “We good? She won’t wait very long for me…” The crew nodded silently and talked amongst themselves about who would follow them as Peter slipped out the conference room.

* * *

Flash was using a ruler to push all of Peter’s stuff away from the divide. Peter looked up from his screen with a sigh, watching him for a moment.

“What are you doing?”

“Cleaning up my desk. Can’t focus.”

“That’s my stuff. Stop pushing it.”

“it’s on my side”

“No, it isn’t”

“Yes, it is. I’m just tidying. Maybe if you kept you stuff on your side of the desk this wouldn’t happen.”

* * *

“This place isn’t too bad once you get used to it. It’s less rigid than a lot of other publications and some people take that a little too far.” Flash explained.

* * *

Peter was sat taping multiple pencils to his phone line and edge of his desk, turning to the camera with a smile as Flash came back from the toilet.

“What is this?”

“Decorating.”

“Well, it’s a safety hazard. I could fall and puncture an organ or something.”

“Here’s hoping.” Michelle said without looking up from her screen. She raised her hand, showing her crossed fingers. Peter smiled and bit back a laugh.

* * *

“I actually run the Neighbourhood Spidey-Watch twitter in my spare time. It’s dedicated to monitoring his movements around the city and celebrating all the work he does. If you contribute to it then you’re expected uphold the same values he would.” Flash explained. “You know, so I care a lot about safety.”

* * *

“Parker! You causing trouble again?! Get in here!”

Peter sighed, catching Michelle’s eyes and shrugging. Michelle watched him carefully as he walked into Jameson’s office, squinting. She turned back to the computer screen, freezing when she caught sight of the camera out the corner of her eye. She wet her lips, trying to focus back on her screen.

* * *

Michelle sat typing on her computer. The rest of the office was empty with only the bare minimum lights on. Once she’d hit print on the document, she pulled open one of her desk drawers, pulling out a huge plate covered by a cloth. She walked past the printer, grabbing her story and walking into Jameson’s office. She put the papers on his desk along with the plate. She stood, pulling off the cloth and revealing Jameson’s mug encased in Jello.


	2. Pretzel Day/Office Olympics

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A dull thud was heard across from the two boys. The camera panned and zoomed in on Michelle, who’s curls now lay spread across her keyboard and desk. No one in the vicinity seemed worried, except for Peter who looked up from his screen and smirked a little. 
> 
> “Every now and then Michelle dies of boredom and it’s my job to revive her.”

** Day Ninety-Two **

The office was quiet. There was little noise other than the sound of fingers hitting keys, and the lightbulb above reception buzzing. IT had started doing that on day thirty-four. Jonah had yet to report it to maintenance and refused to let Betty do so in case the janitor was secretly a mole. It was the most productive the crew had seen the employees. Jonah was slumped over his desk, still visible through the cracks in his drawn blinds.

* * *

“There’s one day where the building does free pretzels with unlimited toppings.” Ned explained, “It’s pretty dope.”

“Jonah usually goes a little… overboard though and ends up crashing from the sugar at around 1pm.” Betty tacked on, leaning into Ned’s side a little. “It’s the most productive day of the year for us… Well... Most of us.”

“What do you mean?” Ned asked, raising an eyebrow at the blonde girl next to him.

“Of course, you wouldn’t notice.” Betty said with a roll of her eyes, squeezing Ned’s hand briefly. “Peter always ducks out early as soon as Jonah hits his slump. Michelle moves the clock forward a few hours, so Jameson won’t notice he left early when he wakes up.”

* * *

** Day Ninety-Three **

The day after pretzel day was just as quiet. Jameson’s office was noticeably empty.

“Jameson always ‘works from home’ the day after pretzel day,” Michelle shrugged, “His wife freaks out about his cholesterol and he takes her out to placate her.” She crossed her arms over her chest, causing a crinkling of fabric against the microphone. “Why are you guys still here?”

* * *

“I’m here! I’m here!” Peter shouted as he rushed into the office, throwing his backpack at his desk and practically jumping into his chair, spinning round to face Jameson’s office. His hair was a mess and he had a dark smudge on his jaw line. Michelle was observing him through a squint.

“Post-Pretzel day, dude. You’re fine.” Ned called from where he was playing paper football with Cindy and Harrison, flashing a quick grin at his friend then muttering a curse when Cindy snuck a shot past him.

Peter slumped in his seat, wiping the sweat off his brow. He caught a glimpse of himself in his computer’s dark screen, catching sight of the smudge, eyes flicking to the cameras and rubbing it away in a hurry. “New York Subways, huh?” He mumbled, focusing on logging on to his computer.

* * *

Peter was sat at his desk, fist propping up his cheek. His other hand was occasionally pressing the enter key on a blank email, addressed to Michelle. Flash had his back to the other boy, feet propped up on Abe’s desk and chair leant as far back as it could go without tipping, playing ‘Spidey Swing’ on his phone.

A dull thud was heard across from the two boys. The camera panned and zoomed in on Michelle, who’s curls now lay spread across her keyboard and desk. No one in the vicinity seemed worried, except for Peter who looked up from his screen and smirked a little.

* * *

“Every now and then Michelle dies of boredom and it’s my job to revive her.”

* * *

Peter shuffled his chair round next to Michelle’s bumping her shoulder. The girl turned her head to face him, cheek pressed against the keys, her hair hiding her bored expression. Peter lifted his hand for a second before clamping it tightly on the edge of his chair.

“Wanna play a game?” He asked.

“Saw reference, nice.” She mumbled, lifting her hand to brush the hair away from her face. Peter’s hold on his chair loosened. “You have my attention.”

Peter grinned and leant a little closer, grabbing one of the stray post-it notes on her desk and crumpling it into a ball, “Sometimes I try to throw stuff in Flash’s mug.”

Michelle snorted and took the paper ball away from him. She took aim and the ball bounced off the rim of the mug.

“Try it with a paper clip.” Peter suggested, holding a couple in his palm for her to take. Michelle took a few shots with them before finally sinking one into the mug.

“Heh.” Michelle paused, cocking her head. “Pretty fun, even if you do have ridiculously sweaty hands-“

“What?!” Peter croaked,

“Wonder if anyone else in the office has some games…” She continued, ignoring his interruption.

“Uh… I know Ned and that lot play paper football sometimes?” A grin spread across Michelle’s face. She stood and pulled Peter up along with her, dragging him across the small office.

* * *

The rest of the morning saw Peter and Michelle spending time at each desk, learning about the games that each cluster had created during their work hours. They had quickly decided that there needed to be a day to celebrate the creativity of the office. At lunch Michelle disappeared, leaving Peter to corral the office whilst she created some medals.

After lunch Peter and Michelle gathered everyone in the kitchen, most seeming happy to leave their desks, but Flash hung at the back of the group with an unimpressed glare.

“Welcome, welcome to the first annual Office Olympics,” Peter called out, Ned echoing eerily from beside him. “And with this candle that I found in the men’s bathroom,”

“Room, room, room.” Ned echoed again. Peter side eyed him with a smirk.

“Which will burn like the-… the-…” He paused, lighter poised above the wick of the candle as he stumbled over his words.

“Hope!” Abe called, to which Michelle nodded and signalled Peter to continue.

“Yes, Abe. Hope indeed. This candle will burn like the hope we all have.” He finished, lighting the candle and closing his eyes for a second.

“Nerds.” Flash grumbled before heading back into the office.

“Now the bronze medals are really blue, and they’re also the back of the gold so no switching.” Michelle called as Peter and Ned ushered everyone into the conference room for the first game of the day- Flunkerton.

* * *

The conference room was a scene of chaos as Betty and Cindy were racing round with a ream of last week’s unsold paper tied to their shoes. They laughed as they pushed each other until Cindy crossed the line having tripped Betty in the final second.

“Brutal, Moon. Brutal!” Michelle cheered before crowning the winner with her foil medal. This had been the most energetic the crew had ever seen the office. Even Flash had gotten involved in a few of the rounds which had been a surprise to most. Michelle was unable to keep the grin off her face, contrasting her usually cool and disinterested demeanour. “Now on to the final game, Peter, if you-“ She started to say, cut off by Flash’s phone ringing.

“Hold up!” He shouted, answering it. He didn’t even get a word in, and after a second of him picking up the call the office knew who was on the other end. He held the device a few inches away from his ear as the tinny voice bellowed through the speaker. “Annnnnddd. Jonah is a minute away.” He grumbled once the call was finished.

At that everyone started to disperse, including Ned after he helped Betty out of her paper reams. Michelle’s smile quickly dropped as she watched everyone disappear.

“Guys… Come on…” She started to say, stopping as she watched them settle in at their desks, blatantly ignoring her calls. “Guess it was fun whilst it lasted…” Michelle shrugged to Peter before following suit and going back to her own desk.

* * *

“MJ is really, really talented. When she’s into something she puts everything into it, and it’s-…” Peter let out a breath, running a hand through his dishevelled hair, doing nothing to tidy it. “But… She works here so that doesn’t happen often.” He mumbled. His eyes were focused on something outside the conference room. The cameras turned to see Michelle through the window, fiddling with her aluminium foil medal and lazily typing a single key at a time on her keyboard. “Jonah puts her on conspiracy pieces about Spi-Spider-Man most of the time.” Peter stammered, eyes shifting back to the cameras. “If he let her write something the Black Dhalia murder then… damn… Buzzfeed better watch out.” He said with a sad, tight smile.

* * *

“Hey, MJ.” Peter said, jogging up to her before she left the parking lot. “MJ, hold up.” He gently tugged her arm to gain her arm. She stopped and turned, pulling out her earphones.

“What’s up, Parker?” She asked, her expression a lot less cheery than it had been earlier.

“We still need to do the closing ceremonies...” He replied, holding out his hand and nodding back to the office. Michelle looked down at his hand, biting her lip before taking it and letting him lead her back inside, towards the roof.

* * *

“If Spider-Man were a real hero he’d sort those goddamn delinquents out that keep hanging around behind the office!” Jonah grumbled, cigar between his fingers. “Instead he’s out there delaying police activity and causing havoc!”

“What exactly do the kids do?”

“Set fireworks and firecrackers off! Makes it bloody impossible to get any work done! If Spidey was a true hero he’d help people like me. Help the American Working Man!”

* * *

It was dark, but the camera could make out two figures sat together blocking the light from the spark of the firecrackers in the parking lot. The camera zoomed in as the shorter of the figures rested their head on the taller figure's shoulder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I decided to post the rest of what I had written since I was still feeling a little inspired from yesterday. Very much a combo of two episodes from two different seasons, but OH WELL, gotta love Spideychelle being soft for each other. 
> 
> Things are starting to get a bit hectic again so I'm not sure when/if I'll be posting again.


End file.
